EURO-CONDOM: one size fits all stupid bulb bans

2009-October-28

Just two months into the EU’s incandescent bulb ban, and you are already out of frosted bulbs? Don’t fret; the EURO-CONDOM, Ingo Maurer’s statement against the EU’s bulb banning madness, may also be the answer for those who haven’t stocked up on non-glaring incandescent lamps.

euro condom beret

This friendly chapeau above is EURO CONDOM by Ingo Maurer, a silicone light bulb cover currently produced by Colourcover in England. It will try its best to protect you and your incandescent light bulb from the EU’s recent bulb ban madness.

 

euro bulb condoms packs

Any one of the differently colored packaging variants contains an identical, translucent white bulb cover. Note the user instructions on the packaging. Sorry, no scents, all very neutral.

 

euro bulb condom wrongly

The shocking image above shows how the agents of the perverted Empire of EUville wish you’d use this product: All wrong!

 

euro bulb condom possibly

Much better, this is one thinkable way how you could use the product to protect you and your family from ugly light. But then, do what? Better keep the EURO CONDOM, and send the CFL to your favorite pro-CFL parlamentarian or EU office as a gift!

 

euro bulb condom correctly

Finally, this shows the correct application of a EURO CONDOM.

Details:
While carefully rolling down from the top to the bottom of the bulb, build up and keep some tension in the semi-elastic condom. Try to keep the center tip right on top, and try to keep layers of silicone rubber from folding up. Fits snugly on 60 mm bulbs, a bit loose at the base of recent 55 mm diameter bulbs. Currently, no (refractive-index matching?) gel is supplied with the EURO CONDOM, thus it’s a rather dry procedure as the silicone tends to stick to itself and the bulb’s glass. Luckily, most folds can be carefully picked and pulled to shape later because the silicone cover seems to be much more resistant to damage than customary condoms.

EU incandescent bulb search squad

2009-August-29

Brand new, this leaflet was dropped by aircraft in order to warn the inhabitants of Gibraltar of imminent search & destroy operations by the EU’s special incandescent bulb search squad!

EU light bulb search squad

updated gdr cfl stamp series

2009-August-29

Contrary to popular belief, the state-planned socialist economy of communist Eastern Germany is not dead; instead, the EU in Brussels is issuing electric policies and spreading propaganda lies that are strangely reminiscent of the days of Nicolaie Ceausescu and Enver Hodcha.

No wonder that the old East German stamps just got an upgrade!

europaeische giftpilze ddr gdr cfl
Beautiful european mercury poison mushroom of the novel compact fluorescent kind. Experts may recognize the bulb design, it’s “made in Eastern Germany.”

55 jahre ddr gdr cfl
Here, ever optimistic East German youths are shown celebrating 55 years of Socialist East Germany just a few years ago – and the proud new sign of centralist European planning and energy micromanagement bureaucracy: the compact fluorescent bulb!

andris piebalgs ddr sed parteitag communist party convention cfl brigadier
Last, but not least, catch a glimpse of the beauty of Communist single party rule that inspired the well known con(servation) artist Andris Piebalgs, better known as the EU’s Energy Commissioner, to paint such a heroic eurocratic light bulb change brigadier…


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.